I've always been a bit slow... Slow on the uptake, slow learner, slow walker, slow decision maker, slow to process things, slow typer, I even have a slow heart rate, low blood pressure & body temperature. I'm just generally slow at most everything I do. Turtle speed. How does this factor into today's blog post? Well, I've been trying to figure out why exactly I'm so cranky, I mean besides the fact that I seem to be having a full 2 weeks of PMS, which is lovely, but I can muddle through that. Nope, there is something else going on with my subconscious, which I intended to figure out, slowly of course. This morning I had an Aha! moment, a Wow! moment, I've got it!!!
I knew I wasn't directly pissed off at anyone, certain people were annoying me more than usual, but nothing that was their fault really. So this had to be on me, somehow, and it is!!! I am irritable, due to my lack of forward motion, especially over the last 3 weeks. I think I'm actually a little bit pissed at myself, or maybe that is how I motivate myself, get pissed off at myself, not sure. Either way, it's got me thinking, and that's at least some kind of forward motion, right?!?!? Over the holidays I was okay with my lack of exercising, I was busy and we had a lot going on, I just wasn't able to get to the gym. But now I'm looking for any excuse NOT to go, I don't want to go, I don't care to go. That's just stupid, and it's bringing me down. I am overwhelmed by the "Attic and Library Project" I know I need to get that handled but I just don't even know where to start, it's very daunting! On top of my complete laziness, and overwhelmedness{yes I know that's not really a word, but I like it!} I got the February prompt for the "One Little Word", Ali Edwards, project I'm doing. This prompt is killing me!!! Usually I expect to wait for a bit for ideas to come to me, and they aren't always good ideas, sometimes they are cooky ideas, or simple ideas, or stupid ideas, but at least they are ideas and I can work through them, change them up, move on to other ideas. Right now I've got NOTHING!!! I don't even have to have a great idea, I mean really, this is my personal project, it's not like it's for someone else. When I work on the kids scrapbooks I try to consider how they would like things to look, stuff they like, but this project is all for me, so even a hokey, cooky idea would be great right about now. Maybe I'm worried cuz I know I will be showing all of you, and what you will think of my crazy approach to this project. Shouldn't really matter, it's my project, I'm the only one who has to like it/understand it right?!?!? I even considered changing my "Word" so this would be easier!!! But that seems a little like quitting to me and I might be lazy and I might be slow but I'm not a quitter.
So today is a new day!! I'm not letting any excuses keep me from the gym. I'm going to keep an open mind about this project, it will come to me, and I'm going to try and find an approach to the attic that makes it seem less daunting and overwhelming {like a dumpster and close my eyes and just start pitching stuff in!}
Today I am moving forward, slowly, but at least it's forward motion!!! It's a long process, this giant list I've set up for myself this year, but as long as I keep my eye on the finish line and keep working toward the goals, I will get there. I will make it to the end of this, slowly but surely, I will finish. HEY, that's okay, we all remember who won that one race- you know the ONE race they ALL talk about to this day, it wasn't the hare, it was the tortoise... Today I am the tortoise, BE THE TORTOISE!!! I may be slow, but I am no quitter, I am the tortoise!!! I am also cracking myself up right now!!!!! WAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
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