Well it's been a while, not sure why, not like I don't have plenty to say!!! Since my last post I have continued to walk and made it all the way to the 5k mark 3 more times{yea!}. I won't lie I slacked on Friday, Saturday was a short but brisk walk and Sunday well I'm getting WAY ahead of myself. Lets back up to Wednesday{I wouldn't want you to miss one moment of my exciting life!!} On Wednesdays walk I found a couple of silly goodies for my 5k art piece

They may not look like much now but just wait!! {ah, hell they may never look like much!} Thursday was kinda more a stop and smell the roses 5k kinda walk!  Ali was most interested in the cows!!

So we took a detour up the railroad tracks to get a good look at them!

We stopped and looked at some pretty little wild flowers

Saw a farmer working the land

And we decided that even a drainage ditch can be pretty, from the right angle ~if you squint your eyes...

Beauty really is subjective isn't it!! If you look hard enough you can always find the beauty in all things, It's never difficult for me to find the beauty in nature... My walks have been visited by grasshoppers, caterpillars, butterflies, moths, crows, countless other birds, a squirrel, deer and cows. ALL BEAUTIFUL.  But I find it much harder to see the beauty in other things, I suppose that is one of those things I need to work on!! I have even seen a dead squished snake and baby turtle, that made me sad, wish I had seen them alive!  Would it make me that sad to see a squished person???? Depends on the person I suppose, and yet it didn't depend on the animal, not everyone likes snakes, and yet it made me sad. Food for thought!
Anyway! That brings us to Friday... Didn't walk! Went to the barn with Maddy right after work, then we went to see Lion King 3D with friends Orion and Peggy, bummed I didn't take more pics! Movie was pretty cool. Sound kinda sucked! And they wouldn't give me Simba 3D glasses, cuz I'm not a kid, HA! They really do not know me AT ALL!!! 

Got a new app for my iPhone! Fishbowl...

 Maddy

 Ryan

 Tallon

 Maddy

 Orion

 Orion

Orion

Creepy yet fun!!! That brings us to Saturday... Up and off early! Maddy and I went to watch the Alma varsity Volleyball team play in a tourney in St. Louis.  It was good to see some of the girls Maddy played with for years, and nice to see some of the parents! It was fun.  I do miss watching volleyball, and some of the peeps! I do NOT miss the long drives and getting up at 5am!!! Later Ryan and I got groceries and then we went for a walk, neighbor stopped us to chat, so then we had to make it a quick short walk! Sunday... We got up early and went to Midland, to watch Ryan race his dirt bike. Tallon couldn't ride cuz he crashed Saturday and smacked his head! Broke his helmet and gave himself a concussion!!! Yeah, totally freaking me out! But there was a very pretty sunrise on the way Sunday morning

And we drove past the new wind mills!  I was VERY excited to see those!  I took a ton of pics and carried on like a little kid!  I couldn't help it, they were just so AWESOME

My iPhone really just doesn't do them justice!!!! You gotta go see them if you get the chance!  Can't wait til they are all up

And then we went to the races.  Ryan got 2nd in the 35+ class{35 years old or older class) and then he blew up Tallon's YZ250 in the big 30 minute money moto! This is where I got all my exercise for the day!  When Ryan didn't come around the track with the rest of the guys, I knew something was up, but he didn't show up and didn't show up.  I saw Tallon start running to the back of the track, and decided I better get my fat ass back there and see what's up too!!! I won't lie, I was worried, but when I saw him just standing there, I was a little ticked off, and I let him know!!! "If you aren't going to finish a race, unless you are hurt, push that Mother F***ing piece of sh*t bike back to the Damn trailer, so I know you aren't dead!!!" Yeah, that's how I show my love and concern!!!!  The reason he was riding Tallon's old bike was cuz his bike is all busted up, AGAIN!! Ryan has had the worst luck with bikes this year! Not sure what he is gonna do next weekend... UGH!!!!!! He hates when I take his picture, he's kinda dirty too!!!!

That brings us to Monday!! Nothing exciting happened at all today. I've been making some lists.  We are going away next weekend to Gaylord Otsego Club for a big motocross race. There will be lots of pics from that!!! But until then, I try to figure out how we will handle things like eating healthy gluten free meals {while in a hotel for 2 days}, do they have WiFi so Maddy can go{she needs to study for a big exam!} Who is going to watch the dogs, what will the weather be like{it was freezing last year}blah, blah, blah!  It rained, I walked!  I did find a few more items for my 5k art work!!! I am planning to run to the craft store next week some time and buy a big canvas, will post pics of my Work in progress, then!!! And now you are up to date!!!

WOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOO

Well readers, I did it!!!!! I freaking did it!!! I walked the whole damn 5k, down and back 3.1 miles!!!! Okay, now for the sad honest truth... it took 65 minutes.  That is so pathetic. I have to cut 35 minutes off my time in the next 10 months, is that even possible??? Maybe.  I will keep trying! The worst case scenario is that I will make it but it will take forever.  At least I know I can make it, without dying!! I have also noticed that the days I eat good, I have more energy to walk, go figure. Yesterday I ate a lot, I was kinda full, but it was all good food. Ali was a pain in the ass last night too! She was trying to eat every grasshopper, she had to stop and pee, she wanted to chase some critter, I didn't even notice until she was almost ready to run, she even started chewing on the leash, like a puppy who had never been on a walk before.  She was bored.  Maybe she needs her own iPod, LOL!!!! My music of choice last night ~Metalica's S&M.  At one point I found myself singing out loud and wondered ~If you sing out loud, walking down a deserted road and no one is around to hear you{except the dog and she is busy chasing bugs} are you still off pitch??? The coolest part of the walk, CROWS! Lots and lots of crows were gathering at my turn around point, some were in the road, and there was a big flock on each side of the road. The thing with crows, they never stick around long enough for you to get very close, but I tried to get a pic anyway, it sucked! On the way back a few flew over head and Caw'ed at me.  For a second I thought maybe I had mistaken their intent.  Maybe they weren't there to congratulate me after all... And of course I had to stop along the walk and take a few pics. And I stopped to get the mail.  So maybe if you factor in all the distractions, I could knock a few minutes off my time. I definitely need new shoes! Maybe I will get the new Nike iPod shoes??
I did not end up doing any projects yet this week, gotta find some clear table space first.  But I did come up with a big project idea for the walking... I will make a big canvass, paint it, and start attaching little goodies I find along the walk each day.  Yes, picking up trash is now going to be part of the walk and my next art project. Goofy I know.  Will see how it goes, and I will post pics too! 
After the walk, I went to the barn with Maddy, she gave her first ever, riding lesson. It was fun to watch her be the teacher. I brushed the other horse, Magic. She has trust issues, so we are working on becoming friends. I bribe her with treats! And that pretty much concludes the excitement of the day!! Pictures???

Riding lesson, life lessons...

CROWS

 crows in the tree...

 My view heading back home...

 Maddy and her new student Emily, leg wrapping.

 Magic...

Business first! This past weekend I found out I had another blog reader!!{which puts me at 2.75 total readers} I am very excited to hear this, since I have NO CLUE who is reading these!! Maybe if I understood technology, I would be able to figure it out, but I can't SO maybe when you all stop by and read, you could leave a comment, some feedback, or hell just your name! Let me know you are reading this!!! THANKS!!!
I'm going for a more light and up beat blog today...
Life has not been that exciting, reading, work, walking, trying to eat better. And aside from the reading none of those have been going that well really. Sundays walk was kind of a flop. Didn't really wanna walk, about a 1/4 mile into it my belly started to hurt, I thought ~oh my workout pants are a bit tight, that's the problem, so I rolled them under my fat roll and continued on.{I refuse to buy new pants, seriously I've owned these 2 pair for years and haven't worn them out, sure it's cuz I haven't worked out, but still, why buy new!}Anyway I walked on and the pain in my belly was not going away, but becoming more familiar... I need to poop!! Seriously! NOW??!! I considered going over to the ditch and dropping my pants, but there are just way too many things that could go wrong there. 1) I'm too short, weeds are tall, AND when your legs are a foot long it's hard to get your butt past your feet. 2) No toilet paper, not even a dirty snot rag! 3) the dog... 4) what if someone drove by, my luck it would be just a I stood up.  NO ONE wants to see a fat chick with her pants around her ankles{well except my husband, the chubby chaser!}I tried to walk further, I got up the road a bit and there was a dog on the loose, and since his peeps weren't out, I decided to turn around, he's been eye-ing Ali the last few days, being one of the only females in the hood she gets a lot of attention!She's a hot Bitch{~by that I mean, she is an unspayed, female, in heat!} We only made it about a mile in total. No good pics, but there were tons of grasshoppers! Which I read are considered a sign of good luck to the Chinese, and have many other symbolic meanings, so I considered that cool but couldn't manage a picture of one, even though they were jumping out every 2 seconds! Even Ali lunged at one or two!
So Monday we did better {I pooped before we left!} Maybe it was the change of music again... I decided to listen to Skid Row. I thought of it after reading my book this past weekend, Corey Taylor mentioned being a big fan of Sebastian Bach.  And I thought dang I haven't listened to that CD in a loooonggg time. Made me think of the olden days, parking with Ryan. Then I thought, Hey maybe if this 5k training gets me back to wedding dress size we should have a 25th wedding anniversary party!  That would be fun! I haven't done anything creative in months, since June. Noting really creative, nothing you can call a true project.  I should do something, make something! Maybe Tuesday I will... See these are the crazy things that pop into my head while walking! Don't you wish you were inside that brain just once -in-a -while!!  Anyway, The clouds were super cool I took a bunch of pics and we made it a total of 2.75 miles, there and back.  Later Ryan drove me up the road and back to see where my 3 mile mark was. I can do that by next week I think! So here's some pics from Mondays walk, now that I've way over shared, I gotta go! {time to poop!!} JUST KIDDING!!!

 

These are two I enhanced with an app on my iPhone, kinda cool looking!

Celebrating Maddy

I said I was going to do this Sunday but I'll be honest I finished my book, and tried to figure out how to get pictures of her on here.  If the pics don't load directly from my iPhone to the computer, I have NO CLUE how to get them on the computer, and Maddy wasn't home to show me how, soooo her Celebration Blog might not look as good as Tallons did.
MADDY~

It's harder to write about Maddy, when she was younger she was so shy and had such terrible social anxiety, I had to talk for her most of the time, and now it seems like every time I talk about her she says just the opposite. I am very glad she no longer suffers from these issues, I'm so glad she has grown up and become her very own person, don't get me wrong, she has ALWAYS been her own person, she just didn't have it in her to tell you, out loud, who that person was. Now is different.  Maddy has always had a quiet confidence about her, she was confident in everything she did, even if she didn't know how to do something she had the confidence in herself, to go find out how to do it.  She is a very hard worker.  She is driven. If she wants something she will work hard to achieve it. Yes sometimes she is too hard on herself.  Maddy has had several true passions in life, fitness, volleyball, and horses.  She worked hard in all areas of these and has endured injury, ugliness, and still never gave up. I am proud of all she has done and the way in which she handled herself getting it done.  But lately the horse has been the area that I feel like celebrating the most, for her and about her. When she was given the {wonderful} opportunity to ride a horse that belonged to someone else, she totally embraced it.  Chip is a wonderful horse and it was incredibly kind of his owners to make this offer. He hadn't been ridden for a couple of years, he is getting up there in age {20+}, he'd had a couple of injuries in his day, and it was already a few months into show season, and he did not belong to Maddy.  To some people those may have been insurmountable odds, and some people would have been content to just ride him around.  But Maddy, being Maddy, she went for it all.  She got a lot of advice from my horse riding bff, Shelli, and his owners, and she did everything she could to make this a wonderful experience for herself and the horse.  She worked him slowly into shape, she took extra care and concern for his old injuries, she got herself back into horse riding shape, and she learned his little personality quirks and what it took to work together with him. She learned how to load and unload a horse. She learned how to pull and back up a trailer. {I learned a thing or two along the way also!} She went to a couple of shows, they did well. She took him to fair, and a while at the fair I experienced what a truly wonderful horse person she really was. She took the entire week off from work, to make sure she had plenty of time to get him out of his stall and exercise him {to keep him from swelling} she took extra care of his legs, using poultice every night and rinsing him every morning.  Then a couple days into fair, she found out he had a bad case of thrush, he cold barely walk She sat in his stall with him, she worried non stop until she could find someone who could help her out and start the process of getting him healed up.  They told her what they could try to do to get him in shape to show, and she touched us all when she told the farrier that she didn't care if she couldn't show him, she just wanted him healthy.  Showing was secondary to all other things at that moment.  She continued to care for him, and eventually he was pretty close to ready.  They had a few kinks to work out, he was a bit stir crazy from being in a stall, but they got through. They ribboned in every class, and they had fun.  She chased down and gave what-for to some stupid kids who were blowing blow horns and scaring the horses. The last night of fair she was so worried that the fireworks would scare him, that she stayed with him the entire time. Now I'm not saying all girls don't love their horses and I'm not saying they don't all take care of their horses.  But Maddy goes the extra mile, hell she goes 2 miles.  She has a love and kindness about her that moves me to tears, seriously!{and I do not not cry!!} She gave him everything she had in her to give and if you asked her why she would tell you that -he was giving her everything he had in him, and that she truly loves that horse. I'm not telling you this story to brag about my daughter, I'm telling you to celebrate her spirit, her kind heart, her drive, her ambition, her devotion to another being, her desire to learn, and do what is best for someone/thing else. And lets not forget how wonderful they looked together{she does love to groom!}and how wonderful she looked. She looked beautiful on that horse.  I am not bragging, she is a pretty girl, that's just a fact. BUT you can be pretty and still be ugly!  She is not.  She has a quiet beauty about her.  She doesn't know how pretty she is, and all these good qualities she has within her and her confidence are what carry her to the next level of pretty, she is beautiful. Even in a pair of grubby jeans, dirty boots, shoveling horse poop, she is still beautiful. When you watch her shoveling poop or riding or just being in that barn, you see pure love, enjoyment and relaxation on her face. Some people might not notice it, but I've been watching her for 18 years. And I know when she's happy {and I know when she is not-even if she doesn't want to share it with me} This is how I celebrate Maddy, by watching her do the things she enjoys or be with the horse she loves. These are the things that make me enjoy being around her. These are the qualities about her that inspire me to be a better person, to work harder.  When I walk, and I'm bored or I just want to quit,  or my hips hurt, I think about her and how hard she works, not just in fitness but with that horse.  I think about her knee injuries and how painful it was to get through them. I think about how much work she put into a horse that is not hers, I think about a deal I made with her. I think about the fact that she will honor her commitments to Chip and the deal she made with me, because honor is important.  She will work very hard, she will do the best she can, she will do what is best for him always, and do the best they can, as a team, next year. And she will do it with love. So who am I to quit!!!  This is how I Celebrate Maddy, this is how she inspires me:

And I wanted a picture of her lookin' really good on Chip, but my ignorance for technology has yet again gotten the better of me! Sorry Maddy! And sorry to my readers if these past 2 blogs sounded sappy or braggy. I don't mean to, I just needed to spend a few days Celebrating my children and appreciating them for being in my life. I am lucky they decided to have me for a mom!

Tallon & my Road of Determination

It's been a while, but I'm back!!!
I want to start this blog post by stating something for the record so there is no confusing; I love both my children.  Completely, totally and equally.  No favorites here, I just happen to love each one differently and love certain characteristics about each one more than others... does that make sense? In my head it does. So over the weekend I am going to blog about my kids, separately.  I tried to decide how to go about deciding who should go first, and decided that we would just go with birth order, so today will be about Tallon

Before I start typing  and bore you to death about how great I think my kids are let me tell you how this blog came to be.  I went to a funeral this week for a young man who ended his own life. They talked about him and read a poem/letter he had written his mother, then talked about how this great, wonderful kid had had a moment of temporary insanity. How else do you explain someone so responsible and smart and kind and talented doing such a thing? It hit me, because those people have something about them.  The gifted are always plagued with a darkness. A sadness that others can't see or understand. They are always fighting this off, they are much more deeply and easily wounded by the bad in the world becuz they don't understand why people are bad They feel empathy in their core. They don't just feel others pain, they know it, they absorb it like sponges~I guess.  That's just my opinion on the matter, and I do have a reason for sharing that opinion, which we will revisit later.  Later that day I decided that I was going to look for a positive in this{if there is one  ~Ryan thinks I'm always looking at the glass as half full} Right or wrong twisted or not I was going to go home and celebrate that I still have my children. Growing up my G'ma would always say "there but for the Grace of God go I." Now I'm not sure that I believe that God has anything to do with it, actually I think that is the Christians way of twisting things so that they sound pretty instead of being blunt and straight up honest. Me being straight up honest AND blunt will say. I am so sorry for their loss, I hope they find the courage and strength necessary to cope.  I hope I never have to know or experience that kind of grief, and I am so glad my son is here, and has made better choices.  {We could go on and on about why he made said choice and what could have prevented it but that is not mine to decide.}
So we went to River Rock for open Mic Night,

with both my kids to watch Tallon,Jake and Ryan. And I watched and appreciated him and the gift he has been given even though I am aware of the darkness that comes along with the gift. I am constantly on guard, watching my son.  I ask him a lot of questions and constantly try to evaluate his mood.  He thinks I am being nosy and I am too involved in his life sometimes but I need to know he is okay and that I am doing everything I can to make sure that the artist in him is doing okay.  Over protective, maybe, mellow-dramatic, maybe. He is the very reason I believe the way I do about the girted, see Tallon is a very talented singer/songwriter/musician. I have seen, over the years, the darkness that tries to take hold of his soul.  He is a very sensitive, kind-hearted, sweet young man.  He constantly questions why humanity has to be so horrible to each other. He is fiercely protective, and loyal to his loved ones, including his little sister. People do not understand the gifted, and treat them unkindly at times.  Tallon has managed to surround himself wth some really great people.  He will always accept you for who you are, as long as you are willing to do the same.  
When the kids came home today from the health club and their visit to the new nutrition store in town, I celebrated by appreciating the knowledge they had gained, and listened to the stuff they had to tell me about my health choices.  And finally, I celebrated my son buy listening to his CD when I went for my walk, and I used his words to inspire and encourage me...
 ***********************************
Open my eyes to different world
with more confidence
and joy than before
One deep breath
Rejuvenates my chest
Not for you but only myself

I will not fall to my knees
for something not worked for
All my pride, and my soul,
sweat for this all.
I will climb to the top
with my own bare hands
I will not fall to my knees
anymore!

The long winding Road of Determination
takes away all these
cares in this world
One deep breath
rejuvenates my soul
Then push it harder
than before

I will not fall to my knees
for something not worked for
All my pride, and soul
sweat for this all
I will climb to the top
with my own bare hands
I will not fall to my knees
Anymore!
******************************
 I am fortunate that he feels I am worthy of knowing what most of his song lyrics are about, and I  know that this song is  NOT about my personal battle with fitness!!! But that is what is great about great art, I can use it to inspire me and make it my own.

This is my Road of Determination:  

And this is my inspiration:

I could go on about Tallon.  I could talk about how he looks so much like his father it freaks me out sometimes.  I could talk about how proud I am of him.  And how he works very hard at both his jobs, but those are all just details.  Not the core of what makes him, HIM. His art, his music is his passion and I have always been moved by it and his ability to move others. I have actually been asked  how I can keep from crying when he sings.  Kinda funny. The thing is he has no idea how much people are touched , inspired, and moved by his music. I hope he never loses his passion and drive to make music.  I hope he continues to touch , inspire and move people.  But mostly I am enormously eternally grateful he is my son and I hope he is always happy...

Today, just a quick post cuz I need to get my house in order!!!!
Back to the walking ~Last night we made it to Harrison Rd. and back!! WOOOHOOO! That's 2.5 miles!!!

I was bored within the first block!!! Ali even seemed bored.  I was having a tough time motivating myself to take this walk, but at least it was breezy out, not too hot.  I waited until after supper cuz I thought it was kinda warm at 80 degrees, but it wasn't. Just the same maybe I should walk before I eat supper.  We soldiered on, despite the boredom.  And soon enough we were there!  We did it!! I stopped for a quick second to snap a pic on my phone and realized there was a tiny little bit of a rainbow in the sky.  Seriously! {Sure maybe it was lack of oxygen to my brain} Was Mother Nature rewarding me, for the missed sunset, for soldiering on, for completing the 2.5 miles!!! Or was it her reminding me that if you take a second to enjoy being outside in nature, you will always find the beauty!! I'm not sure but I'm calling it both! I tried to take a picture but an iPhone can only do so much!!  I now realize that, I may have made it all the way out but I still had to make it back, then the music in my headphones picked up pace{even Apocalyptica was urging me on!}and we turned around and headed for home. On the way we passed the pickle field again, and the beans, and then the corn and I wanted to yell out ~that's right, we walked right on past you today and the next time you see us we will be walking briskly, bitches!! {as opposed to the current mosey!} I chose not to yell it out, cuz like most things it would've sounded better in my head than out loud!!!
Other life notes:  Ryan and Tallon are riding a Valley tonight.  Having band practice Wednesday. And playing at Open Mic Night at River Rock on Thursday. Big week for them.  I will be tagging along, like I usually do.  I really need to get my own life!!! I will be sweeping up dog hair tumble weeds and doing dishes and sorting pictures!! I have a giant pile of pictures, from January to now that need to be sorted.  I will tackle that this week. I joined a Facebook weight loss group.  Seems fun, and supportive, even though my goal isn't to lose weight~ it's to NOT die during a 5k, if I lose a few pounds along the way, well that will be fine too!!! We all know I need to!! And Maddy is studying all week.  Won't see her again until Saturday. Although I am thinking I would like to surprise her with a healthy study break snack one night this week... anyone have any good ideas???

odds and ends from the weekend

Well, I took a bit of a break this weekend. Was I busy or just lazy? Maybe a little of both.  The basic facts; Friday night I went with the boys to Valley Motocross.  I took our dog, Ali, that was a bit of an adventure, especially since she LOVES to chase the dirtbikes!!! I thought possibly we could walk a bit while we were there, but that just didn't work out.  Then we went out to eat.  Got a very excited phone call from Maddy ~SIDE TRIP~ her and her friend Lauren got backstage passes to meet/hang out with the bands!!  SERIOUSLY!! How cool is that!!  She was soooo freaking excited.  She took NO pictures, cuz she didn't want to seem rude or stalker-ish.  So she just hung out.  Got a phone number from a manager, if she ever wants to get tickets to a show!!! This may seem completely out there to most people, but for my kids, kinda normal.  It seems most times we go to shows they end up meeting someone VERY cool, or getting great seats or some such thing!!!
Saturday morning we got up and went to feed and water my brothers dog{brother was in the UP} and then went to see a friend in the hospital. Then we went out to eat. Then we watched the final outdoor motocross on tv and we snacked! Sunday, feed the dog again. Out to the barn with Maddy, my cousin stopped over with her 2 little children, they wanted to meet Chip{the horse} they were a little afraid, but it was cute!! I spent most of the day watching 9/11 coverage on the History and National Geographic channels. Between episodes Ryan and I got groceries.  Not a really exciting weekend but that's what happened.  Seems like there was a lot of eating and NO walking!!! Oh well back on track today.
I have to add this was a very strange emotional weekend for me, and part of the reason that I didn't blog.  I am not a supper sappy person, but I'm not a heartless bitch either, so when it comes to things that cause me some emotional distress or confusion I find it best to keep it to myself, until I can really get a handle on how I feel and the best way to discuss it.  I was worried about Ryan's good friend Mike, being in the hospital.  It was a bit serious for a while but I think it's in check now.  Still makes you think, we are getting older.  On our way home I got a phone call from bff's husband with some horrible news.  A good friend of his son, Coleton, had shot himself Friday night/early Saturday morning.  {He called me cuz Shelli is in Oklahoma and he wasn't sure if he should call and ruin her trip.  I said yes. She will read it on Facebook, and then be worried about Coleton, which she was/is anyway}GEEZ OH PETE'S!!! I will not exaggerate my relationship with this boy or his family.  I've known him since preschool, my daughter knew him, we knew his family, and his sister has been to my house a couple of times, with her bf. But we were not close.  I am not sad for myself or my children, I have no right to be. But I am terribly upset for his family and for their loss.  I cant even believe how sad I am for them. I don't know if I have a right to be this sad for someone I barely know. But I am also sad and worried for Coleton.  Some horrible things were said to people and their is a lot of guilt out there. I hope people can find a way to deal with this tragedy, that doesn't cause more pain for this family!! Maddy was so angry at people, she even posted on Facebook about it!  It takes a lot to get Maddy ticked enough to post!! Then Sunday watching the 9/11 coverage, more sadness, but with a lot of good stuff and heroes and awesomeness too.  I don't know why I felt the need to watch soooo much of it.  Maybe cuz {I think I may lose my mind someday and} I want to remember this event forever.  I want my kids to remember and their kids and theirs... I want my kids to grow up to be the kind of people who would stand up and be those heroes, and to raise children to be. {Hopefully we never need to find out.} I believe my husband and kids have it in them though.  I learned a lot of things I had not known before these shows. I wanted to find a way to honor those lost and the heroes and military, but couldn't think of a way to do that, so I just sat and watched.  I'm glad I watched, but it was just way too much emotion for me in one weekend.
~~It's amazing to me what people can overcome, and saddens me that some people just can't overcome. I am grateful I have friends and family, that I know I will always be able to turn to, to help me overcome. And I hope that if the day ever comes that they {or anyone else} need my help, I will be there for them. I hope I am that kind of person.  Isn't that what being an everyday hero is about, helping those around you overcome adversity, and being the kind of people that do the right thing, and don't cause more pain than is already necessary.  Shouldn't we all strive to be a hero.....

truely just a ramble for today...

Well, last night I wasn't feeling very good, so I napped, and ate supper and went to bed. Didn't go for the {stupid ass} walk.  Which I was mostly okay with until Ryan called me and said to run outside and look at the AWESOME sunset. {Yeah, he's kinda like that-don't let his tough guy exterior fool you!}Then I was pissed cuz I didn't get to see it in it's full effect and if I had just soldiered through, I would have!! Life lesson learned, you can't see cool shit outside in nature if you are laying your fat ass in the chair, thanks for the friendly reminder Mother Nature!!  
Found out we have a good friend who is sick and in hospital, so been concerned about him yesterday and today. 
Maddy is going to a very cool Avenged Sevenfold and Bullet For My Valentine concert today @ DTE.  I am very excited for her, she has been wanting to see them for a LoooonnnnnG time!  This is her first real rock concert without any parents{mostly because of the age constraints placed on concert goers and the fact that her parents usually want to go to these shows with or without the kids!!} and she does plan to meet and possibly marry M.Shadow, so hoping all goes well!!
Not sure if we have any exciting big plans for this weekend, living with Mr. Fly-by-the-seat-of-his-pants, means I never really know what our plans are! But I do still plan to determine how far 3.1 miles is, from my porch and back.  I am going to work on that looming project list.  I have been struggling with the picture-of the-day{POTD} for my Project Life album, so gonna see if I can't figure something out for that. And I am going to try to figure out how to download pictures to this blog so my vast readership can see what I am rambling on about, not just read it!! Interactive!
I really thought I would enjoy NOT being busy all the time, but some days I think I am bored.
Fall is coming and I have VERY mixed emotions about that. Maybe if my weekend is completely boring I will blog about my feelings on, and potential plans for, the coming season change... Sound compelling??  Yeah, I like to make sure I keep you coming back for more!!!!

The dog, The {stupid ass} walk, and Apocalypitca

Today's blog may be short or weird, I'm a bit tired. Out too late last night!! Went up to see Maddy, took her a surprise friend, Orion, ate dinner, colored her hair, and then sat in Orion's driveway chatting until very late!! Had Fun!! All of this was of course, AFTER the {stupid ass} walk!!! I've decided that I may want to share tidbits from the walks and progress reports! This could get very boring!!!
After walking several times I think I have made some decisions about the walk. First, that I might not want to walk alone. The reason, mostly someone to say hey, let's go for that walk!  A motivator. The problem, the schedule {or complete lack there of} at our house doesn't really allow for me to have a walking partner. So I decide to take the dog! Alex Marie {we usually just call her Ali, but she has a whole slew of silly names too!!} the 5year old black lab.Yup! That was my first big walk decision, don't go alone, take the dog. Every day she will be very excited to go. She, like me, has not yet gotten her post-baby figure back {Although she is only a bit chubby where as I fall under the category of fat/ bordering on obese}.  On the off chance that there is a chubby chaser rapist out there, she can protect me, OR when I get super model hot from all this exercise she can protect me! Oh and when I am singing out loud people will just think I am talking to the dog!  The only downfall with the dog is,  she is not big enough to drag me home if I have a heart attack along the way, and she has no thumbs to dial 911.  Second big decision, what music I like to walk to. I have decided {for now}, I am going to walk to Apocalyptica. I've tried other music and I have decided I like walking to music with no words. It allows me to think about things and kinda clear my head. So I skip most of the songs with lyrics and walk. I think this music will be good once I actually run too, it seems that any pace will work with it.  But who knows I may just change my mind in 2 days! SOOOO
I write Ryan a note{which reads: went for the {stupid ass} walk -took ali. left at 4:15 if we are not back by 5ish please come look for us, I may have had a heart attack}, I put the collar on Ali, and off we go! She is a good walker, not too fast. She gets a bit distracted by the dead squirrel and some unknown odd thing in the road she thinks she needs to eat and the occasional movement in the tall grass along the road. At this point I start to wonder would she protect me?? she is such a scaredy cat!!!  But on we go.  I take a few pictures from the road. {someday I will figure out how to post them} and we make it about 2 miles or so. I got a bit of a tummy ache today, but I think that may have been from the pre-walk snack of Lays potato chips, peanut butter cups, and ice tea! Enter Third big decision, stop eating so much junk food or I'm never going to make it!!! And Forth and final decision, set some minor goals, nothing serious yet!!  So goal for this week ~Harrison Rd. and back.  By end of week, step up the pace from a mosey to an actual walk. Go from there!! This weekend I will make a drive to figure out exactly how far 5k{3.1 miles}is from the house and back.  I would hate to over train. And I found a couple web sites that talk about training for these {stupid ass} 5k walk/runs... this is serious business now!  Oh and some good news, we have a new member on the 5k team~ Miss Aly Brecht, thank you for joining!!! I will see you at the starting line, then I will watch as you speed off and I won't see you again until I finish the race {either on foot or gurney} Of course by that time you will have had a short nap while waiting!!!LOL!!!! Maybe we should think of a name for this team, I see matching t-shirts...
Fun things happening today~ Work, maybe a trip to Valley Motocross track with the boys, Tallon and Ryan, and of course the {stupid ass} walk

Intentions, Hell, and the 5k

My intention for this new blog of mine was to get up early every day and create my blog before I start my day.  My intention for this new blog of mine was to tell you all about my intentions for each and every day of my {very} exciting life. Yesterday, I created a list of all my projects that need to be started, finished, or just generally needed some attention. {The list was pretty dang long!}  More intentions!! 
Today I went to work, then ran some errands for my daughter, which involved a trip to Super WalMart {hate that new store and it's stupid parking lot, just for the record!} then I will take her WalMart purchases to her, eat dinner with her and color her hair.  Some where in there I need to fit in THE stupid walk. AH YES, another good intention!! The walking, which is intended to lead to the running, which is intended to lead to the 5k!!
***Let me just make a quick side trip and tell you about the whole 5k business... At the end of a very long,   stressful, exhausting, fair week I opened my {big fat}mouth and made a crazy/silly challenge to my daughter. As we were eating breakfast the last morning of fair, the 5k was about to start. I'm not sure if it was the complete exhaustion, coupled with the sugar buzz from the syrup and pancakes that caused my moment of complete delirium, but I said, out loud "Hey, next year if you make High Point at fair, I will run that 5k!!" Yeah, I made the challenge! WHAT WAS I THINKING!! I can't run 5ft. let alone 5k. I don't even know how far a "k" is! I don't even really know what High Point means!! She of course, being her fathers daughter, accepted my challenge, right there on the spot!  We have a secondary challenge that states if she doesn't high point, but ribbons top 3 in all her classes, I still walk the 5k.  This year she did ribbon in every class{not all top 3}, so there is a good chance that she will at least meet that challenge! UGH! Now, I'm not one to wish for my childs failure, BUUUUUTTTT!!! Now keep in mind that she has some pretty tough competition in her age division at the fair, but she is also pretty driven. SO, I have decided that it is best to be prepared for my defeat!! She is a bit of an exercise freak so when I made the {delirium induced} challenge, I meant it more as a celebration of all her hard work, but now it just seems like my defeat! I have also rallied some other people into this challenge along with me, my son Tallon said he would do it {he already runs several k's a week, so no big deal for him} and {my bff} Shelli's husband, John said he was in, and Shelli did too {but I think she was lying just to make me feel better} SO there you go ~that is the story behind the stupid walk!!! Now my training begins, my intention, is to be able to run the stupid 5k{without dying}and in under 3hrs.

Now this crazy quote keeps jumping into my head about the word intentions... something about The road to Hell is paved with good intentions. Yikes!! Well, since I have already cut a pretty nice path for the road crew to start work, I feel I should do what ever is necessary to not start paving it just yet.  In other words, I'm still on the 2-tracker. What does that mean for me??? I guess,I will go for that THE stupid ass walk again tonight, and try my very best to be ready for a 5k.  I will get some focus and tackle that stupid project list. Maybe putting it in writing will help me be more accountable. BUT, I have decided that I don't have to type this in the morning, it's my blog, I make the rules, and I doubt that is considered an intention that could cause too much grief for anyone else, since no one is reading it anyway!!! And the really good news, I'm not sure I believe in Hell anyway!!!{and that's a topic for a whole different blog!!} So what the Hell!!

And So it Begins...

Well, here it is, my first {and who knows, it could be the last} EVER blog post. This all started because my BFF {and as I like to call her, my moral compass} Shelli, went on vacation, leaving me with NO ONE to talk to.  See, she is really the only person who can tolerate my ramblings on about nothing and all my crazy opinions, and ideas!! So, if this turns out to be really horrible, it will be all her fault!! LOL!!!  Today I was reading Facebook and all the moms out there were talking about it being the first day of school and such and that got me thinking and there was not enough room in that little status square on Facebook for all my thoughts, and without Shelli to talk to this blog was born!!
SO here it goes... my thoughts on back to school~
Today, parents everywhere sent their kids off on their 1st day of school, and it occurred to me~ I did NOT! For the first time in like 15 years, I did not have a 1st day of school to help get ready for.  Both my kids are DONE with school! And of course parents everywhere are having a wide range of varied emotions about this day, NOT ME! I'm happy!  I never cried when I sent my kids off on any of their first days, and I didn't cry when I sent one off to college this year... Am I just a heartless bitch? I don't think so! If I ever shed any tears, they were tears of pride, tears of joy!  They are both ready for Life's Next Big Adventure, and so are we! I am proud of all my kids have accomplished and want them to go out into the big world and be successful at WHATEVER they choose to do. Their next big adventure is theirs to choose. My job was to get them ready to do this, and so I could not be sad when they left for their very first, 1st day of school or when they no longer had a 1st day...
And this brings up the next thought~
What is my{our} Next Big Adventure???  I don't know what life has in store for us. {Do any of us ever REALLY know??} BUT my job duties are now being redefined, I am no longer a stay at home mom! No more school functions, no more sporting events{ I will miss volleyball!}, no more committees, no more packing lunches!!! {My husband would say "Then get your ass to work!"}And that got me to thinking{again} What are my new job duties? What is next for me?   Should I write a parenting book? WAHAHA!! Those of you who know me, are laughing {hard} right now too!! And those of you who don't can already tell by my writing skills that this is NOT an option! Should I go back to school myself?  NAH!!  I always hated school. Should I go to work? Maybe, more money would be nice. Should I clean this house??? DEFINITELY!! Should I pursue my hobbies as a real source of income?? Hmmm...  The list goes on and on!!! I don't really know what is next, but I think I am ready to embrace it! That is it for today's ramblings...
This blog will {hopefully}get more exciting, as I learn how to do stuff on here, add pictures, projects, who knows this could get huge and I will have guest bloggers ~WOW the sky is the limit!!!